The secret to making meaningful change

A few years ago I had the privilege of learning a profound truth that most people spend their lives denying:

What we refuse to acknowledge within ourselves, often gets projected onto others.

The recent Blake Lively Vs Justin Baldoni drama perfectly illustrates this.

For the record, Im not one to get drawn into Hollywood scandals but this saga has me rather intrigued.

If you look at Baldoni's content online, he seems to be the most conscious man on the planet.

Check out his TED talk from 6 years ago and you'll know what I'm talking about.

Right? I mean, the guy seems like he's the epitome of integrity!

In all honesty, I used to be a fan but can no longer make sense of any of this.

It’s not like any of us can fully believe or swear by media coverage either, but if the claims against him hold any truth,it just highlights the classic human shadow effect.

This is the suppressed, darker aspect of ourselves that we haven't confronted or made peace with.

And if you look closely enough, the signs are everywhere-

👉🏻Therapists who are gambling addicts,
👉🏻Pulmonologists who smoke,
👉🏻Marriage coaches who are having affairs,
👉🏻Religious priests who are shamelessly committing sins, and of course,
👉🏻A director who has made an entire movie (It Ends With Us) on sexual abuse and has allegations of being guilty of exactly that.

The shadow is notorious for influencing our behavior in unrecognizable ways and the constant denial in ourselves begins to reflect in the actions and judgments we cast on others.

This is why I'm obsessed with self-awareness because that’s where our ultimate power lies. It’s the only way one can take accountability and create opportunities for meaningful change, Without that, we remain stuck playing the same unhealthy patterns on loop.

Besides, living in denial isn't just about leading an inauthentic life; it's quite literally harmful to others just as much as it is to ourselves.

Self-evolution is lifelong work, but it starts with acceptance.

Because what you refuse to acknowledge, you can never change.

So this year, before you set out to make grand plans for Self 2.0, make peace with whatever part of yourself you have been suppressing.

It’s only then that you can create space for something new.

Happy 2025💜

In case you missed me last week…

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